Dr. Jessica Peck We would like to take a moment to thank our sponsor, PreBorn. When a mother meets her baby on ultrasound and hears their heartbeat, it's a divine connection. And the majority of the time she will choose life. But they can't do it without our help. Preborn needs us, the pro life community, to come alongside them. One ultrasound is just $28. To donate, dial pound250 and say the keyword baby or visit preborn.com/AFR Candace talks
about finding out she was pregnant. Thankfully, an ultrasound provided by PreBorn allowed her to hear her baby's heartbeat. The sonogram sealed the deal for me. My baby was like this tiny little spectrum of hope and I saw his heart beating on the screen and knowing that there's life growing inside. I mean, that sonogram changed my life. I went from just Candace to mom. Thank you to everybody that has given these gifts. You guys are giving more than money. You guys are giving love.
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Dr. Jessica Peck welcome to the Doctor Nursemama Show Prescribing Hope for healthy Families here on American Family Radio. Here's your host, professor, pediatric nurse practitioner and mom of four, Dr. Jessica Peck.
Dr. Jessica Peck Well, hey there friends and welcome to my favorite time of day getting to spend time with you, prescribing Hope for healthy families. And I've got something on my heart today that I really want to share with you as I am continuing to read the research that is coming in about the impact of AI, as I'm continuing to meet with families on the ground, in my community, in clinical practice, through my students, through every sphere of influence, through my own children, I am increasingly aware of the impacts of AI And AI is happening. That's artificial intelligence, by the way, that is happening in light speed. It feels like I'm living dog years here. It feels like seven years are wrapped into one because so much is changing. And we look back and now it seems like social media and smartphones change the world at a snail's pace compared to what AI is doing. And even in my teaching, in my practice, when I look at the progress that is happening even in one month's time, I am absolutely amazed. You know, we'll start to use something, we'll start to learn something. And then by the next month it is like it's own entity. And that's something we're going to continue to need to talk about. And so I want to bring a message to you today about that and really give you some encouragement because a lot of times when we start to hear the headlines about AI and particularly how they're impacting our children, our first response is primal. It, it is fear. It is often fear based. And we just start to be afraid. Am I doing enough? Do I know enough? Are my kids protected enough? What's going to happen? But I want to remind you, as I often do, that God has not given you a spirit of fe and he has given you the family you have for such a time as this. And we can navigate those things together. So I'm going to encourage you today not to get your head turned by all of the the technology changes that are happening at the speed of light, but really to concentrate on the principles that never change and the tools that God has given us in his word that have stood the test of time for thousands and thousands of years and help to disciple families. And that's really the core of what I want to talk about today and help to ra your eyes to a concept of family discipleship as but looking at it through the age of AI now we know that we are living in an age of unprecedented access to information that's good and frankly that's bad because we have good information and we have very bad information. And above all of that is the unprecedented competition for the hearts and attentions and minds of of our children. That is absolutely happening. But we don't need to be fearful. We need to be faithful in all of that. Because parents today are not simply raising kids. You are, as we have been since the beginning of time, raising image bearers of God. Now we may be doing that in a world where every screen, every algorithm, every influencer, every AI platform is competing with us. But there have been competitive forces for as long as there has been human history. And these competitive forces are seeking to shape what your family believes, what they value and even what they want, what they want in life. And the greatest challenge facing modern families may not be that overt hostility to the faith as we've talked about before with Todd Nettleton, voice of the Martyrs and talked about persecution of Christians globally. And we know to some extent that Christians are facing difficulty here, even in the United States. But right now what I see is the greatest challenge is the const erosion of the home's influence through a thousand micro messages that are coming through culture every day to compete with a child's worldview. Now, scripture gives parents a clear and compelling mandate. And this is something that is relevant today. It comes to you from Deuteronomy 6. Now, God did not assign the primary responsibility for spiritual formation to schools or to churches or youth groups or Christian institutions or influencers. He entrusted it for verse to mothers and fathers. These words that I am giving you today, those were written thousands of years ago. They're still for you today are to be in your heart, repeat them to your children, talk about them when you sit in your house, when you walk along the road, when you lie down, and when you get up. Now, don't get me wrong. The church is indispensable and Christian education is valuable. Christian institutions such as this one are such a helpful, important resource, and faithful pastors and mentors are gifts from God. But none of those things, things, none of those people were designed to replace the ordinary daily discipleship that happens around our dinner tables and our car rides at bedtime, through family conflict, even. I'll talk about that. And then a thousand quiet moments of ordinary life that are happening in between. So today I want to help you reclaim your home as your primary place of discipleship for the health of your children. I want you to understand how culture is all already discipling your family. And I want you to learn how to build resilient relationships that can withstand any pressures the digital age throw our way. And we'll talk about some, I'm going to play a clip for you in just a little bit about one of the world's best technology leaders and how they're handing over their own decisions and agency to AI. What does that mean for children and teens especially, whose brains are still being formed now? The reality is every child is already being discipled, even if you don't have an intentional plan for that. The only question is, who is discipling your children? What is discipling your children already? Now, discipleship is simply the process of becoming like someone or, or like someone. And, and, and as Christians, we want to become like Christ. It's that repeated shaping of our likes, our loves, our habits, our beliefs, our behaviors. It's just continuing to walk in the image and bear the image of Christ in this world to pursue San until we go home to heaven. And the Bible assumes this shaping begins in the home. That is the, that is the model that was created. And discipleship is not just another item that's on our to do list. It's not just okay, well, we need to feed, clothe, bathe everybody and disciple them. Discipleship should encompass everything that you do. It is the purpose that gives meaning to everything else. So everything is discipleship. Whether that's family dinners or bedtime or chores or sports or discipline or celebrations or even suffering or trials. These are all opportunities to point children toward a, loving God who created them. And God's design for this has always been intergenerational. You know, Deuteronomy 6 tells tells us to talk about these things. And Psalm 78:4 says, we will tell the next generation the good works of the Lord. And so this faith is not merely just taught in church or, or as a spiritual class, a life group, a Sunday school class. Whatever it is, it is really caught through intergenerational daily life. And parents are the primary disciplers of their children. The church partners with families. It cannot and should not replace them. But one or two hours a week at church cannot outweigh 50 plus hours of digital media consumption of culture that children are absorbing the rest of the week. Most children, and I'm talking, have a equivalent of a part time job where they're equivalent, where they're consuming media 20 to 40 or more hours a week. That is a lot, a lot of influence. We used to talk about the influence that teachers had in the classroom if children were in school outside of the home and thinking, oh, that's 7 times 5, 35, 40 hours a week. Well, now we've got digital media on top of that. And modern families in today's age face enormous pressures that diminish the influence of the home they have over scheduled calendars. We are constantly busy. We, our family life is fragmented. Even in our home where we're living in separate rooms on separate screens, everybody's streaming their own reality. And we have parents who are exhausting and feel like they're surviving and thriving is just, an unattainable goal.
We have outsourcing of moral and spiritual formation to schools and social media and entertainment and even AI
We have outsourcing of moral and spiritual formation to schools and social media and entertainment or even AI. Now here's the thing. Culture is not neutral. You know that. It's not simply out there just waiting for us to evaluate it. It's not, there's not mystical gate that exists in our homes where culture waits there and we're able to let in what we want to or not. It is actively trying to shape us now more than ever. And historically the church used something called catechisms. Now this is a systematic process of teaching and reinforcing the truth through repetition, through questions, through Stories through daily practice. And the culture has developed its own catechism because the culture often runs parallel and will mimic these strategies of the Church of Faith. And it made not come in the form of a classroom or creed. That culture is coming in, but it is being delivered daily through screens, through social media stories, through algorithms, through streaming entertainment, through influencers who are advertising through social media. Every day our families are being taught what to love, what to fear, what to celebrate, what to reject, where to identify and find meaning. And that can change from day to day. What's celebrated today can be canceled tomorrow. In the most powerful culture, cultural messages are rarely explicit, they're rarely specific. Most you know, series that you're streaming don't begin with today. This show is going to teach your child a new moral framework. Viewer, beware. Like, we don't see that social media doesn't say, when you watch this reel, we're going to reshape your understanding of beauty, truth and happiness. There is no disclaimer like that. But that is exactly what repeated exposure is already doing.
Every storyline is producing heroes and villains and shaping a child's view, an adult's view of good and bad
Every storyline is presenting heroes and villains and shaping a child's view, an adult's view of good and bad. Every algorithm rewards certain values and behaviors while minimizing others. And every influencer is modeling a vision of the most perfect life. This is goals, hashtag goals, hashtag life goals. This is the good life. Every algorithm is rewarding certain values and behaviors while trying to minimize others. Children and teens, they're not just consuming this. Content creators are, are helping our children and teens and us as adults, to absorb assumptions about what's normal, what is true, what is desirable. And that is something we should wake up and pay attention to. Because in many ways, our digital culture functions as a 24 hour discipleship machine. These algorithms are designed to hold our attention and they do that by learning what do you want? And I'll give you more of that. Kind of reminds me of the White Witch in the Chronicles of Narnia. You know, G. Edmund, you know, more and more of what he wanted and knowing it was harmful. They are not reacting our preferences, they're intensifying and reinforcing our preferences. And the more time that we spend immersed in these environments, the more they're shaping our imagination. What we think about, what we dream about in that worldview is not primarily built by information. It's built by what we love, what we hold affection for, what we and we become, what we love. And culture is constantly training us on, on what is desirable. So I want you to consider some of These messages that children are hearing every day in culture, and we are as adults too, that your identity is something you create, not something you received. We see a phenomenon called image crafting. That's the intentional process of shaping and manage the image or the identity that we're posting publicly online. We carefully curate our life to give people the highlights. And this is how I want you to see me. This is the image. This is my personal branding that we have. Culture says, your feelings the ultimate authority. Hey, if it feels right to you, it must be right. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Culture says happiness is found in self expression and self fulfillment. The highest goal is to discover your authentic self, whatever that may mean, and pursue whatever makes you happy. Treat yourself. Doesn't matter what it costs, doesn't matter the consequences, you just live for. Today, culture, says comfort should always be prioritized over sacrifice. Like, if something is hard or inconvenient or uncomfortable, like, just walk away. Ghost it. You don't need that in your life. If a relationship becomes difficult, walk away. So instead of working through conflict with grace and forgiveness, hey, just unfollow, block, ghost, replace unfriend. Look at all these words that we have. People who challenge you. You don't need their voice in your life. Culture says the truth is personal. It's flexible, it's relative. What's true for you may not be true for me. And no one has the right to claim that any, moral standard applies to anyone, to everyone. Culture says you deserve constant affirmation and instant gratification. You should always feel validated. Like, don't take the the word no for an answer. Now contrast that with a biblical story. Your identity is created in the image of God and redeemed by Christ. Genesis 1:27 says so God created man in his own image. He created him in the image of God. He created the male and female. 2 Corinthians 5:17. If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. And scripture says feelings are real, but not reliable guides. Jeremiah 17:9 says, the heart is more deceitful than anything else and incurable. Who can understand it? So yes, feelings matter, but they have to be anchored to God's truth. And scripture says joy is found in surrender to God, not self sovereignty. Matthew 10:39 says, Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life because of me will find it. True and lasting joy are discovered not by putting ourselves on the throne, but by following Christ. And growth comes through sacrifice, discipline and perseverance. These are definitely countercultural when we come back, I'll have more help and hope on your family discipleship. See you after this break. Hello, I'm Jessica peck, host of Dr. Nurse Mama. Did you know that this content is listener supported? Without people like you, this podcast would not exist. And that's why we need you. A generous monthly gift of any amount will help sustain American Family Radio and specifically this podcast. Please consider becoming a monthly financial partner today by visiting afr.net/give that's afr.net/give
This Is My Song by Heath Balltzglier, Mac Powell, and NORTH POIN and I sang in Christ alone My solid ground Amazing grace Just how sweet the sound on that boogie cross Jesus paid it all because he lives.
Dr. Jessica Peck Welcome back friends. That is this Is My Song by North Point Worship featuring Mac Powell. And that is the message that we can take today that Christ is the solid ground. And when the culture is sinking all around us, which it seems like it can't seek any lower than it does, and then it just continues to amaze us by sinking lower and lower. Listen, those shifting sands are not what we build our families on. We're going to build our families on the truth of God's word. And that's what I'm talking about today. How do we reclaim family discipleship in an age of AI where the culture has invaded our homes and is constantly influencing our kids? How do we have confidence in that? Well, we can have confidence, as I was saying right before the break in the assurity of God's Word. And we know there are countercultural messages in scripture, but these are for our good and for God's glory. And we know that growth often comes through sacrifice and discipline and perseverance. As I was saying, this is one of the reasons why movies like this are so popular, because people love to see a story like that. Hebrews Hebrews 12:11 says, no discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful later on. However, it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. Though those are such much more hopeful messages than the messages that culture has given. And Scripture says that healthy relationships, they require forgiveness, humility, reconciliation, not ghosting, blocking or walking away. Ephesians 4:32 says, Be kind and compassionate to one another. Forgive one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ. Philippians 2:3 says, do nothing out of selfish ambition, in humility, consider others as more important than yourselves. Scripture says that truth is objective because it is grounded in the unchanging character and nature of God. Hallelujah for that. Thank goodness, thank God that we have that truth to build our lives upon. And Hebrews 13:8 says, Jesus Christ is the the same yesterday, today, and forever. And so because of that we know that the deepest satisfaction comes not from consuming. The greatest commandment is to love God and love our neighbors at our as ourselves. Philippians 2 also tells us, do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility, consider others as more important than yourselves. Everyone should look not to his own interests, but rather to the interest of others. For the Son of Man, this is from Mark 10, did not come to be served, but to serve. Now we can listen to all of that. And I think as families, we'd all say, yeah, yeah, that's what we want. That's what we want to build our house on. But it's hard. It's difficult. How do we do it? Because the challenge is that we are fighting a culture that is discipling our kids and us every hour that we're awake and sometimes even when we're asleep. And while many families reserve spiritual conversations for an hour at church once a week, that's not enough. If we are not being intentional about helping our family interpret what they see and hear, cultures messages are going to become the default setting. And they're going to help to help us drift. They will encourage us to drift away so slowly, maybe we don't even notice it. Silence is not neutrality. If we don't actively tell the better story, someone or something else is going to. Now, that doesn't mean that we have to go back to Little House on the Prairie. As much as some of us, I think, would love that, we don't have the to fear every movie, every app, every technology platform have a strict ban in our house because many times that's just not practical. But it does mean we need to engage with them more intentionally and thoughtfully. And we can become worldview coach coaches by just asking some simple but powerful questions. So asking making these conversation points normal in your house, what is this story telling us about? What makes a person valuable? Who or what is being worshiped here? What does this message say about truth and love? success? How does this compare with what God says in his Word? What's beautiful and good here? And what should we be cautious about? So we need to make sure that we're not just focusing on being the content police. Like, oh, that's bad, turn that off. We need to be interpreters and say, why? Why do we need to turn that off? Why do we need to block that stream of influence in our lives? Why do we need to be intentional about it and take the power and not be afraid. But just say, I am intentionally choosing to block that stream of cultural influence in my life. Equipping children to recognize that the messages embedded in culture are around them and to evaluate them with a biblical lens and to be able to be educated, equipped and empowered to respond counterculturally.
Ultimately, family discipleship is about telling a better story than culture
Ultimately, family discipleship is about telling a better story than culture. The world tells our children. I want you to really think about this. They tell our children they are autonomous individuals who must reinvent themselves and chase happiness where they can find it. And m the best story they can create is the one that they are going to create about their life now. The gospel, by contrast, tells them they are all ready, even, before their conception. They are the beloved sons and daughters of God, created on purpose, known by God, redeemed by Christ, invited into a story that is far greater than themselves or anything they could ever create. And if we don't consistently and intentionally tell that story in our home homes, the culture will gladly fill that void. And a biblical worldview is not just one conversation. It's not one dramatic moment, is thousands of very small, ordinary interactions again, as you sit in your house, as you walk along the road, when you lie down, when you get up. And that's encouraging because it means that we don't have to be seminary professors to disciple our kids. We just gotta be present, intentional, willing to let everyday moments become those opportunities that we seek God in. That now. For generations before, parents worried primarily about peer pressure that was much easier to control. And today's challenge is so different. And many of our kids closest companions, I use the word loosely because some of them are just robots or algorithms that are designed to maximize their engagement, shape their behavior, mostly shaping their consumer behavior, try to get them to buy things, stream things, subscribe to things. And we're living really through the greatest social experiment in human history. And it's happening, happening on the backs of our children, where AI is moving from being a tool that we use to a voice that we trust. I've been featuring this on lots of different shows, talking about the sheer numbers of people who are going to AI for counseling, for mental health advice, for spiritual guidance, for relationship advice, for all kinds of things. And culture is no longer simply just coming through the front door. It is living in our pockets. It is streaming in every room of our home. Smartphones have really dissolved the boundaries between the home and the outside world. Families are physically together, but mentally, psychologically, emotionally, living in completely different worlds. If you don't believe this, just ask your Family about the algorithm and what they're seeing. What they're seeing on social media is going to be way different. You're going to say, I haven't seen any of that. And the danger is not misinformation from AI, it's misplaced authority, because AI is increasingly designed to feel relational and conversational, and really that it's trustworthy. It has a trustworthy voice. And children and teens are especially vulnerable to this. Their brains are still. Still developing. They want guidance, they want affirmation, they want belonging. And they're seeking that from the easiest source with least resistance. So I want you to hear something remarkable. I told you I was going to play a clip. And we've arrived at that moment. I want you to hear something pretty remarkable. This really caught my attention from one of the most successful technology leaders in the world. This is American technology executive and investor Nat Friedman. He's the former CE of GitHub. He's a leader in Meta's AI efforts, and he recently was in an interview, and he described an interaction with the. With an AI assistant that really should give every person pause, because in the interview, as you're going to hear in just a minute, he recounts allowing an AI agent to coordinate parts of his day to help him stay hydrated. Take a listen.
Nat Friedman My claw pretty quickly determined that I was dehydrated. And so it was like, you really need to drink water. It was like, trying to find. I was like, all right, you should, like, do whatever it takes to, like, make sure I drink water. And then you literally built the paperclip maximizer. Yeah, it was like, just break laws. Whatever it takes. and then at one point, it was like, I can see you on the camera. I want you to walk to the kitchen right now and drink a bottle of water. And I'm gonna watch to make sure you do it. And I was like, whoa. so I did. I walked into the kitchen and I drank a bottle of water. And then it sent me a snapshot, a frame of me drinking a bottle of water and said, good job. And I was like, I felt like I did do a good job. So that was nice. A couple days later, I was driving home from work, and I was talking to my claw on WhatsApp with voice messages. And I was in my Tesla and I had full self driving on, so it's driving me home. And then it says, I'm on the sleep topic. And it's like, you really should try magnesium bisglycinate. And I'm like, I don't have that. And then my car turned and it was like, you should pick it up on the way home. There's a Whole Foods on the way. I've redirected your navigation system to the Whole Whole Foods. I was like, whoa. So I went in and I did buy the magnesium disglical.
Dr. Jessica Peck That clip should catch our attention. I have thought about it and thought about it since I've heard it. And one of the things that really stood out to me is how people are laughing. Like this is really kind of disconcerting. It's really concerning, but we're laughing about it, which can be a very common human response. But here's my question. If a brilliant, wealthy, highly informed technology executive, someone who helped build this digital world he's describing, is willing to surrender that much agency to AI and just to do, what AI says and to welcome its affirmation, how are we going to expect teenagers to instinctively know where the boundaries should be? This is not a fair experiment to me and it's not not fear mongering as well, but this is really awareness. We need to wake up and pay attention. I'm Gen X and I've frequently been saying I feel like the Jetsons is finally coming to life. Now, AI is a tool, but tools shape the people who use them. And AI is not neutral. And we are delegating, thinking, remembering, deciding, relating to machines. And the more we're risking that, weakening that muscle that we have in ourselves, like we don't know how to do it without that. I saw that even as a nurse when, I'm, I'm a dinosaur of a nurse. And we had all paper charts and now we have computer charts. And it's a really odd phenomenon because if something goes down, the power goes out, we have a ransomware. Then all of a sudden the nurses are like, how do we chart? They don't know how to do it on paper. And that's kind of a similar thing that I'm seeing here. And children, children are watching what we model. Do they see us turning to scripture or a chatbot first? Do they see us processing our problems with prayer, with family connection, with seeking wise counsel, or outsourcing every answer to technology and families? Again, we often have been told that families are told technology is a neutral tool that will make your life easier, more convenient? It's a hammer. It only does what we tell it to do do. And that assumption worked a little bit better in the era of more simple tools that were really didn't have this user interface. It does not hold up well in my opinion with AI systems because AI is not a passive instrument, it is a shaping system. It learns patterns from human behavior. It turns around and influences what you see and what you think is normal and what you begin to desire. And it's not just responding to families, it is shaping the environment around you. Now it's doing that through recommendations, lots and lots of auto recommendations, search results, autoplay videos where you are not making a decision, an active decision in between each video of what you're watching, you're just letting the algorithm feed you whatever it prepared for you. AI companions and even advertising systems, systems are all quietly making decisions about what you are going to encounter next, what is going to shape your worldview. Now these choices are not optimized for biblical truth, for wisdom, for what you need in that moment, for spiritual discipline, it for family flourishing. It is all about engagement, keeping your attention, keeping you on the platform, increasing the clicks. And increasingly what's commodified is predicting behavior so they can keep you in the system longer. And so that's where the idea that technology is neutral just really falls apart.
AI systems are trained on human data
AI systems are trained on human data. They are tuned by human incentives. They are deployed with cultural and corporate goals. There are goals and most of those are monetized. Even when no one is trying to influence your family in a moral sense, that system is still shaping you. It's shaping you to have a shorter attention attention span makes it harder for parents to talk to kids for a longer period of time. Because we are accustomed to let me watch a 30 second reel and by the way, let me hold it down and watch it on two times speed. That's what we want. We have heightened emotional reactivity, we have realities that are curated around us and we think the world is like what's being fed to us. And increasingly personalized truth streams where two people in the same house can live in completely different information systems systems. And for children especially, this influence is very powerful because over time as we have Gen Alpha, Gen Beta now being born, there are toddlers and infants that AI curated content is normalizing certain values. It is amplifying fears and it's shifting what feels interesting, what feels in the moment, what feels urgent. And the really the system is just choosing for us. So the practical takeaway is, is this AI is not just a tool that we're using, it is something that is forming your family, it's something that's shaping your habits. And that means intentional discipleship cannot be outsourced to algorithms. We've got to name what's happening and slow down our default digital consumption. Just passively absorbing whatever culture is feeding us and being intentional. And really the goal is not to be fearful, it's to be faithful, to have clarity about what's forming us, to be intentional and disciplined about choosing that. Because whatever consistently captures your attention in time is going to shape your affection. And these AI systems are master designed. You just heard from a leading tech leader about how that AI assistant grabbed his time. It grabs our time. It shapes our content and our formation, our decision to making our relationships, our presence, our awareness, and even our agency. When we come back, I'll compare and contrast some more messages about what culture says and what we how should we be responding to it? And we'll give a practical challenge instead of what do we do to get our kids and ourselves off the screen. I'll have some thoughts for that for building resilient family when we come back. Don't go away. Choose what you're streaming. This will benefit your family. I'm praying and I'll see you right after the break.
Mark Oss When you hear the letters afr, there are a lot of things that could come to mind. Automotive finders, resource alligator frying research or the association of Flying Rednecks. All great organizations, no doubt. But we hope the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear AFR is American Family Radio, a, listener supported network dedicated to sharing the gospel and promoting godly values. God expects maturity in us. We should not be comfortable living with habitual sins.
So that's a news cycle item. Is it the top news story to God? No, because he warned us about all of this. Now I don't care how nice you think you are, if you're not telling someone the truth, you're not being loving to them.
Make no mistake, we're not anglers from Red Bay, but we are AFR American family radio and we're happy you're listening.
Known by Tauren Wells It's so unusual it's frightening? You see right through the mess inside me and you call me out to pull me in you tell me I can start again and I don't need to keep on hiding I'm fully known and loved by you. You won't let go no matter what I do and it's not one or the other it's hard truth and ridiculous grace to be known. Fully known and loved by you. And loved by you.
Dr. Jessica Peck Welcome back, friends. That is known by Tauren Wells. That is the longing of every human heart. We want to be known. We want to be seen. We want to be loved, we want to be known. And especially for our children, there's a battle going on and culture is fighting for your child's attention and affection. And if we're really honest, honest, it's fighting for ours as well. It is fighting for our attention and time that is being commodified, auctioned off to the highest bidder behind the scenes. And we find ourselves spending more time online than we intended. How many times do we do that? Oh, I didn't mean to spend so long scrolling even when you didn't plan to, you just, just one more video, one more post, one more scroll. And that stretches into hours where we have devices, that are auto playing, auto deciding what we're going to stream. And we see this in information. What we listen to, what we watch is shaped by others. Different family members, even in the same household, are being exposed to very different ideas. Our children are encountering values, humor, or language that we didn't introduce in the home. They are having emotional reactions that are triggered by online content. Maybe they feel afraid, maybe they feel inferior, maybe they feel angry about something that we didn't even know that they saw. All in decision making, we rely on digital suggestions more than our own knowledge or discernment. What we buy, what we're interested in, what our opinions are, are influenced by what is showing up in our feeds. And we adopt those habits, phases, trends, routines, without even realizing, stopping to think about it. Screen use is present during our relational times, for meals, for conversations, for family downtime. We're together, but. But alone. We're alone together. Often.
Dr. Jessica Peck And most concerning is that we are giving away our agency. We are just letting robots make decisions all around us. And that is really, really difficult. And the answer is not just to live under a rock and to isolate yourself from culture. It's being intentional about being the primary discipler in your home, about form, forming your children. Spiritually. We count cannot simply tell our children what to avoid. We can't be the phone police or the social media police. We have to give them something and someone better to love. We have to give them a better aspiration. Our aspiration is to be like Christ, to be disciples of Christ. And every cultural, cultural message should prompt us to ask, okay, how does this influence and shape the habits our families are intentionally building? Now, culture says everyone lives in their own digital world. That's what culture frames it as. But faithful families can counter program that by saying, hey, we build a shared life together. That's what we're about. Fighting the fragmentation of modern life by protecting those daily connection points. I help you do that on Fridays and 52. Habits for Healthy Families. Eat dinner together as much as you can. Drive without. Make everyone wearing earbuds or headphones. Take walks, read aloud, worship, and pray together. The strongest families create regular opportunities for everyone to be present. Culture says, hey, your phone is your primary companion. We even have a scientific name called nomophobia. It means fear of being without your mobile phone. It is measurable. We have that fear. We don't have fear of being without our family connections, but our. Our families can respond to that counterculturally by saying, hey, people before pixels, People come before devices. Let children experience. What does it look like to value people more than a screen? Put your phone away during your movie meal. Don't interrupt your conversation to answer a notification. Make eye contact. Listen with your face. Teach children that people God has physically placed around them deserve more attention than AI generated images. While culture says, curate your images, faithful families say, hey, cultivate your character. That's what's most important. Instead of asking kids, how do you look? Say, who are you becoming? Celebrate kindness. Kindness over popularity. Faithfulness over fame and fortune and celebrity, Integrity over influence. Complement their character. Things like courage and honesty and generosity and perseverance. At least as much, if not more than you. Compliment their appearance, their achievements, their talents. While culture says, express yourself. Faithful families can respond with no. We examine ourselves. We know that every feeling is real, but not every feeling is true. Not every feeling is wise. Not every feeling is helpful. Help, your families develop the habit of asking, okay, why am I feeling this? What does God say about this? What response would honor him? What support do I need in this moment? How do I need to take every thought captive? And family discipleship helps kids to learn to bring their emotions under the guidance of God's truth, rather than letting emotional rule them and rule their actions. Now, culture says, if it's uncomfortable, quit, walk away, block. You don't need that in your life. But faithful families in most situations are going to say, hey, we stay. We don't quit. We work. We forgive, we grow. One of the greatest gifts that parents can give children is watching adults work through conflict with grace.
Because in a cancel culture, they need to know that there is forgiveness, there is restoration
Because in a cancel culture, they need to know that there is forgiveness, there is restoration. No one is perfect. No relationship is perfect. And I'm not talking about relationships that are abusive or need boundaries. I'm talking about just respectful disagreement, humble apologies, genuine reconciliation that happens every day. In a world of ghosting and blocking and canceling, Christian families can model A constant sort of love that's not going to run away at the first sign of difficulty. While culture says, hey, keep yourself entertained, Faithful families can say, say, hey, we delight in being together. And you can build a family culture that's actually desirable, that's enjoyable, that's more compelling than, disappearing into a screen. I'm talking about simple things like playing games or cooking together or working in the yard, even serving at church in your community, going on a walk, visiting your grandparents, traditions, inside jokes, all the things. The goal is not simply to reduce screen time, to be the phone time police release, but to make real time more compelling than that digital artificial substitute. And while culture says the algorithm knows what you need, trust the algorithm, ask the algorithm. faithful families say, hey, wisdom requires discernment. So we've got to ask, what is this teaching me about happiness? What does this story say makes a person valuable? Who or what is being worshiped here? Does this draw me closer to Christ, or is it tripping me up and drawing me further away from him? We don't want family, kids who just obey rules, but young adults who can think biblically in a world full of persuasive messages. While culture says personal freedom means no one tells me what to do, faithful families can say, hey, freedom grows inside healthy boundaries. And you shouldn't be afraid to have boundaries around technology. Hey, in our home we have device. This is our tech free zone. This is our tech free place. This is our tech free time. We have age appropriate social media boundaries, we have digital sabbaths, whatever that is. Boundaries are not a punishment. They are a protection and an environment for freedom and loving families. Help their families navigate a digital world that was never designed with their well being in mind. And while culture says you are what you consume, faithful families can respond. You become what you practice. Practice. And family identity is not just one dramatic perfect devotional, one spiritual high, a mountaintop moment. This is just repeated, repeated, repeated obedience, repeated discipline. And so instead of asking, how do I get my child off my screen? A better question would be, what kind of family, culture and relationship am I inviting them into instead? Instead. So if I'm asking them to get off their screen, what am I inviting them into instead? Because they don't know how to fill the void, their children are naturally drawn to places. Whereas we just heard Torn well sing about. They're known. They feel fully known, safe, loved, wanted and made in the image of God. And so if those strongest sense of belonging they experience comes from an online gaming community or an AI chatbot, a Social media platform, those things are going to become the primary disciplers. But if home becomes the place where they're heard, they're challenged, they're encouraged, they're forgiven, they're grounded in God's truth, they're welcomed, they are known, seen, loved. And the family is going to become what God intended it to be, the primary place of discipleship, where hearts are formed and faith is passed from one generation to the next. And so technology is something we need to be intentional about. And our families are, are going to have hardship, we are going to have difficulties. But AI is accelerating that temptation to disengage because it's offering a, compelling alternative. Something that feels conflict free, something that feels pleasing, something that feels controllable. But God has designed us to grow through real relationships, and that requires navigating conflict. Now when we have family resilience, it's not the absence of hardship, the absence of conflict. No family is perfect, perfect. It's just the ability to rupture and repair. Rupture and repair. We have those things that happen all the time and you get better at it as you practice it. And the, the families that know how to reconnect after that rupture are the families who are going to build resilience. Conflict is not evidence that your family is failing. It's just evidence that you actually live with real humans with real needs and really different perspectives, living in really close relationship. And God culture is increasingly teaching conflict avoidance. But that's not what God has for us. God has that we should repair our relationships as much as possible because AI relationships especially are reinforcing this. It AI is not going to interrupt you. It's not going to challenge your assumptions unless it's programmed to do it. It's endlessly affirming, it's sycophantic, in fact, it's customizable, it's conflict free. Real life requires very different elements of sacrifice and forgiveness and patience. And God often uses conflict as a pathway to deeper relational intimacy. Families could become stronger not because they never argue, but because they argue and they repair. They know how to apologize, to forgiveness, give, to reconcile. And children who witness healthy reconciliation are children who are going to be more likely to develop emotional security and relational resilience.
So we need to make sure that we are trying our best to help our families have that relational repair
So we need to make sure that we are trying our best to help our families have that relational repair. And it's not as hard as you think it is. There's some basic things that you can do to start working on conversations. Conflict repair, pause that escalation, protect the relationship in real time, when emotions rise, you need to stabilize. That's what happens. Okay, we're getting heated. Let's take a break. That happened. Name what happened. Say, okay, describe what happened when the words were raised at dinner, when the phone was taken without asking, when your tone shifted earlier to become disrespectful instead of, you always do this, you never do this and you don't care. Just name what happened. Name the impact. I felt dismissed. I felt embarrassed, I felt unsafe, I felt shut down. That is where you can start to build empathy and then take responsibility for whatever you did. Hey, I owned my part. I raised my voice. And then offer repair. Not just an apology, but a reconnection. And then reestablishing boundaries or agreements if they are needed. I talked about this in giving apologies on a Friday show. When we walk through communication, you can go back and listen to that. And we talked a lot about that, which is so important. But having a simple family value of, hey, we, we're not going to avoid conflict, we want to seek to repair it. We want reconciliation. Rupture is an inevitable. But repair is our practice because children aren't just learning how conflict starts, they're learning how it ends. And that repair process is where your emotional security and humility and relational resilience are fulfilled, formed. And when we look at conflict in families today, so much conflict is happening over use and adoption of technology because it's really hard. You may have a school or some other entity saying, okay, hey, you've got to use the technology in this way, or their friends have this boundary and you have that different boundary. The bottom line is we've got to be intentional about it. The culture is discipling our kids and our families and ourselves every single one day. Are you willing to intentionally reclaim your God given role as the primary place of spiritual formation in your home? And the greatest apologetic that many children will ever encounter is not a sophisticated argument. It's a home where grace is practiced, forgiveness is modeled, truth is spoken boldly in love, and Christ is visible in every aspect of every day life. And long after the latest AI technology is obsolete, which at this rate will be tomorrow, the newest AIs platform is forgotten, which will be this afternoon. What will endure in your family are the relationships you invested in and the faith that you passed on from one generation to the next. Family discipleship is not easy, it is not simple, and it's not quick. Things that are cultured all prioritizes, but it's never been more important. I believe in a world where algorithms are competing for your attention, where AI promises easy answers and culture is increasingly defining truth, God is calling families to a beautifully ordinary mission to love him, to love God with all their heart, soul, mind and strength, and to teach your children. The home was God's first institution. It remains the primary classroom for shaping hearts. Every shared meal, every bedtime prayer, every hard conversation, every act of forgiveness, every moment of just simply being together, even having fun, is an opportunity for discipleship. Our goal is not to raise children who merely know God, but sons and daughters who have seen his character reflected in their own lives. And this is God's design. As you pursue it, I pray the Lord will bless you and keep you and make his face to shine upon you. I'll see you right back here next time. We'd like to thank our sponsors, including PreBorn. PreBorn has rescued over 400,000 babies from abortion and has seen over 100,000 commitments to Christ. Will you join PreBorn in continuing this good work supporting young moms in crisis? Save a life today? Go to preborn.com/AFR the views and
Jeff Chamblee opinions expressed in this broadcast may not necessarily reflect those of the American Family association or American Family Rights.
Dr. Jessica Peck We would like to take a moment to thank our sponsor, PreBorn. When a mother meets her baby on ultrasound and hears their heartbeat, it's a divine connection. And the majority of the time she will choose life. But they can't do it without our help. Preborn needs us, the pro life community, to come alongside them. One ultrasound is just $28. To donate, dial pound250 and say the keyword baby or visit preborn.com/AFR Candace talks
about finding out she was pregnant. Thankfully, an ultrasound provided by PreBorn allowed her to hear her baby's heartbeat. The sonogram sealed the deal for me. My baby was like this tiny little spectrum of hope and I saw his heart beating on the screen and knowing that there's life growing inside. I mean, that sonogram changed my life. I went from just Candace to mom. Thank you to everybody that has given these gifts. You guys are giving more than money. You guys are giving love.
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Dr. Jessica Peck welcome to the Doctor Nursemama Show Prescribing Hope for healthy Families here on American Family Radio. Here's your host, professor, pediatric nurse practitioner and mom of four, Dr. Jessica Peck.
Dr. Jessica Peck Well, hey there friends and welcome to my favorite time of day getting to spend time with you, prescribing Hope for healthy families. And I've got something on my heart today that I really want to share with you as I am continuing to read the research that is coming in about the impact of AI, as I'm continuing to meet with families on the ground, in my community, in clinical practice, through my students, through every sphere of influence, through my own children, I am increasingly aware of the impacts of AI And AI is happening. That's artificial intelligence, by the way, that is happening in light speed. It feels like I'm living dog years here. It feels like seven years are wrapped into one because so much is changing. And we look back and now it seems like social media and smartphones change the world at a snail's pace compared to what AI is doing. And even in my teaching, in my practice, when I look at the progress that is happening even in one month's time, I am absolutely amazed. You know, we'll start to use something, we'll start to learn something. And then by the next month it is like it's own entity. And that's something we're going to continue to need to talk about. And so I want to bring a message to you today about that and really give you some encouragement because a lot of times when we start to hear the headlines about AI and particularly how they're impacting our children, our first response is primal. It, it is fear. It is often fear based. And we just start to be afraid. Am I doing enough? Do I know enough? Are my kids protected enough? What's going to happen? But I want to remind you, as I often do, that God has not given you a spirit of fe and he has given you the family you have for such a time as this. And we can navigate those things together. So I'm going to encourage you today not to get your head turned by all of the the technology changes that are happening at the speed of light, but really to concentrate on the principles that never change and the tools that God has given us in his word that have stood the test of time for thousands and thousands of years and help to disciple families. And that's really the core of what I want to talk about today and help to ra your eyes to a concept of family discipleship as but looking at it through the age of AI now we know that we are living in an age of unprecedented access to information that's good and frankly that's bad because we have good information and we have very bad information. And above all of that is the unprecedented competition for the hearts and attentions and minds of of our children. That is absolutely happening. But we don't need to be fearful. We need to be faithful in all of that. Because parents today are not simply raising kids. You are, as we have been since the beginning of time, raising image bearers of God. Now we may be doing that in a world where every screen, every algorithm, every influencer, every AI platform is competing with us. But there have been competitive forces for as long as there has been human history. And these competitive forces are seeking to shape what your family believes, what they value and even what they want, what they want in life. And the greatest challenge facing modern families may not be that overt hostility to the faith as we've talked about before with Todd Nettleton, voice of the Martyrs and talked about persecution of Christians globally. And we know to some extent that Christians are facing difficulty here, even in the United States. But right now what I see is the greatest challenge is the const erosion of the home's influence through a thousand micro messages that are coming through culture every day to compete with a child's worldview. Now, scripture gives parents a clear and compelling mandate. And this is something that is relevant today. It comes to you from Deuteronomy 6. Now, God did not assign the primary responsibility for spiritual formation to schools or to churches or youth groups or Christian institutions or influencers. He entrusted it for verse to mothers and fathers. These words that I am giving you today, those were written thousands of years ago. They're still for you today are to be in your heart, repeat them to your children, talk about them when you sit in your house, when you walk along the road, when you lie down, and when you get up. Now, don't get me wrong. The church is indispensable and Christian education is valuable. Christian institutions such as this one are such a helpful, important resource, and faithful pastors and mentors are gifts from God. But none of those things, things, none of those people were designed to replace the ordinary daily discipleship that happens around our dinner tables and our car rides at bedtime, through family conflict, even. I'll talk about that. And then a thousand quiet moments of ordinary life that are happening in between. So today I want to help you reclaim your home as your primary place of discipleship for the health of your children. I want you to understand how culture is all already discipling your family. And I want you to learn how to build resilient relationships that can withstand any pressures the digital age throw our way. And we'll talk about some, I'm going to play a clip for you in just a little bit about one of the world's best technology leaders and how they're handing over their own decisions and agency to AI. What does that mean for children and teens especially, whose brains are still being formed now? The reality is every child is already being discipled, even if you don't have an intentional plan for that. The only question is, who is discipling your children? What is discipling your children already? Now, discipleship is simply the process of becoming like someone or, or like someone. And, and, and as Christians, we want to become like Christ. It's that repeated shaping of our likes, our loves, our habits, our beliefs, our behaviors. It's just continuing to walk in the image and bear the image of Christ in this world to pursue San until we go home to heaven. And the Bible assumes this shaping begins in the home. That is the, that is the model that was created. And discipleship is not just another item that's on our to do list. It's not just okay, well, we need to feed, clothe, bathe everybody and disciple them. Discipleship should encompass everything that you do. It is the purpose that gives meaning to everything else. So everything is discipleship. Whether that's family dinners or bedtime or chores or sports or discipline or celebrations or even suffering or trials. These are all opportunities to point children toward a, loving God who created them. And God's design for this has always been intergenerational. You know, Deuteronomy 6 tells tells us to talk about these things. And Psalm 78:4 says, we will tell the next generation the good works of the Lord. And so this faith is not merely just taught in church or, or as a spiritual class, a life group, a Sunday school class. Whatever it is, it is really caught through intergenerational daily life. And parents are the primary disciplers of their children. The church partners with families. It cannot and should not replace them. But one or two hours a week at church cannot outweigh 50 plus hours of digital media consumption of culture that children are absorbing the rest of the week. Most children, and I'm talking, have a equivalent of a part time job where they're equivalent, where they're consuming media 20 to 40 or more hours a week. That is a lot, a lot of influence. We used to talk about the influence that teachers had in the classroom if children were in school outside of the home and thinking, oh, that's 7 times 5, 35, 40 hours a week. Well, now we've got digital media on top of that. And modern families in today's age face enormous pressures that diminish the influence of the home they have over scheduled calendars. We are constantly busy. We, our family life is fragmented. Even in our home where we're living in separate rooms on separate screens, everybody's streaming their own reality. And we have parents who are exhausting and feel like they're surviving and thriving is just, an unattainable goal.
We have outsourcing of moral and spiritual formation to schools and social media and entertainment and even AI
We have outsourcing of moral and spiritual formation to schools and social media and entertainment or even AI. Now here's the thing. Culture is not neutral. You know that. It's not simply out there just waiting for us to evaluate it. It's not, there's not mystical gate that exists in our homes where culture waits there and we're able to let in what we want to or not. It is actively trying to shape us now more than ever. And historically the church used something called catechisms. Now this is a systematic process of teaching and reinforcing the truth through repetition, through questions, through Stories through daily practice. And the culture has developed its own catechism because the culture often runs parallel and will mimic these strategies of the Church of Faith. And it made not come in the form of a classroom or creed. That culture is coming in, but it is being delivered daily through screens, through social media stories, through algorithms, through streaming entertainment, through influencers who are advertising through social media. Every day our families are being taught what to love, what to fear, what to celebrate, what to reject, where to identify and find meaning. And that can change from day to day. What's celebrated today can be canceled tomorrow. In the most powerful culture, cultural messages are rarely explicit, they're rarely specific. Most you know, series that you're streaming don't begin with today. This show is going to teach your child a new moral framework. Viewer, beware. Like, we don't see that social media doesn't say, when you watch this reel, we're going to reshape your understanding of beauty, truth and happiness. There is no disclaimer like that. But that is exactly what repeated exposure is already doing.
Every storyline is producing heroes and villains and shaping a child's view, an adult's view of good and bad
Every storyline is presenting heroes and villains and shaping a child's view, an adult's view of good and bad. Every algorithm rewards certain values and behaviors while minimizing others. And every influencer is modeling a vision of the most perfect life. This is goals, hashtag goals, hashtag life goals. This is the good life. Every algorithm is rewarding certain values and behaviors while trying to minimize others. Children and teens, they're not just consuming this. Content creators are, are helping our children and teens and us as adults, to absorb assumptions about what's normal, what is true, what is desirable. And that is something we should wake up and pay attention to. Because in many ways, our digital culture functions as a 24 hour discipleship machine. These algorithms are designed to hold our attention and they do that by learning what do you want? And I'll give you more of that. Kind of reminds me of the White Witch in the Chronicles of Narnia. You know, G. Edmund, you know, more and more of what he wanted and knowing it was harmful. They are not reacting our preferences, they're intensifying and reinforcing our preferences. And the more time that we spend immersed in these environments, the more they're shaping our imagination. What we think about, what we dream about in that worldview is not primarily built by information. It's built by what we love, what we hold affection for, what we and we become, what we love. And culture is constantly training us on, on what is desirable. So I want you to consider some of These messages that children are hearing every day in culture, and we are as adults too, that your identity is something you create, not something you received. We see a phenomenon called image crafting. That's the intentional process of shaping and manage the image or the identity that we're posting publicly online. We carefully curate our life to give people the highlights. And this is how I want you to see me. This is the image. This is my personal branding that we have. Culture says, your feelings the ultimate authority. Hey, if it feels right to you, it must be right. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Culture says happiness is found in self expression and self fulfillment. The highest goal is to discover your authentic self, whatever that may mean, and pursue whatever makes you happy. Treat yourself. Doesn't matter what it costs, doesn't matter the consequences, you just live for. Today, culture, says comfort should always be prioritized over sacrifice. Like, if something is hard or inconvenient or uncomfortable, like, just walk away. Ghost it. You don't need that in your life. If a relationship becomes difficult, walk away. So instead of working through conflict with grace and forgiveness, hey, just unfollow, block, ghost, replace unfriend. Look at all these words that we have. People who challenge you. You don't need their voice in your life. Culture says the truth is personal. It's flexible, it's relative. What's true for you may not be true for me. And no one has the right to claim that any, moral standard applies to anyone, to everyone. Culture says you deserve constant affirmation and instant gratification. You should always feel validated. Like, don't take the the word no for an answer. Now contrast that with a biblical story. Your identity is created in the image of God and redeemed by Christ. Genesis 1:27 says so God created man in his own image. He created him in the image of God. He created the male and female. 2 Corinthians 5:17. If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. And scripture says feelings are real, but not reliable guides. Jeremiah 17:9 says, the heart is more deceitful than anything else and incurable. Who can understand it? So yes, feelings matter, but they have to be anchored to God's truth. And scripture says joy is found in surrender to God, not self sovereignty. Matthew 10:39 says, Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life because of me will find it. True and lasting joy are discovered not by putting ourselves on the throne, but by following Christ. And growth comes through sacrifice, discipline and perseverance. These are definitely countercultural when we come back, I'll have more help and hope on your family discipleship. See you after this break. Hello, I'm Jessica peck, host of Dr. Nurse Mama. Did you know that this content is listener supported? Without people like you, this podcast would not exist. And that's why we need you. A generous monthly gift of any amount will help sustain American Family Radio and specifically this podcast. Please consider becoming a monthly financial partner today by visiting afr.net/give that's afr.net/give
This Is My Song by Heath Balltzglier, Mac Powell, and NORTH POIN and I sang in Christ alone My solid ground Amazing grace Just how sweet the sound on that boogie cross Jesus paid it all because he lives.
Dr. Jessica Peck Welcome back friends. That is this Is My Song by North Point Worship featuring Mac Powell. And that is the message that we can take today that Christ is the solid ground. And when the culture is sinking all around us, which it seems like it can't seek any lower than it does, and then it just continues to amaze us by sinking lower and lower. Listen, those shifting sands are not what we build our families on. We're going to build our families on the truth of God's word. And that's what I'm talking about today. How do we reclaim family discipleship in an age of AI where the culture has invaded our homes and is constantly influencing our kids? How do we have confidence in that? Well, we can have confidence, as I was saying right before the break in the assurity of God's Word. And we know there are countercultural messages in scripture, but these are for our good and for God's glory. And we know that growth often comes through sacrifice and discipline and perseverance. As I was saying, this is one of the reasons why movies like this are so popular, because people love to see a story like that. Hebrews Hebrews 12:11 says, no discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful later on. However, it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. Though those are such much more hopeful messages than the messages that culture has given. And Scripture says that healthy relationships, they require forgiveness, humility, reconciliation, not ghosting, blocking or walking away. Ephesians 4:32 says, Be kind and compassionate to one another. Forgive one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ. Philippians 2:3 says, do nothing out of selfish ambition, in humility, consider others as more important than yourselves. Scripture says that truth is objective because it is grounded in the unchanging character and nature of God. Hallelujah for that. Thank goodness, thank God that we have that truth to build our lives upon. And Hebrews 13:8 says, Jesus Christ is the the same yesterday, today, and forever. And so because of that we know that the deepest satisfaction comes not from consuming. The greatest commandment is to love God and love our neighbors at our as ourselves. Philippians 2 also tells us, do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility, consider others as more important than yourselves. Everyone should look not to his own interests, but rather to the interest of others. For the Son of Man, this is from Mark 10, did not come to be served, but to serve. Now we can listen to all of that. And I think as families, we'd all say, yeah, yeah, that's what we want. That's what we want to build our house on. But it's hard. It's difficult. How do we do it? Because the challenge is that we are fighting a culture that is discipling our kids and us every hour that we're awake and sometimes even when we're asleep. And while many families reserve spiritual conversations for an hour at church once a week, that's not enough. If we are not being intentional about helping our family interpret what they see and hear, cultures messages are going to become the default setting. And they're going to help to help us drift. They will encourage us to drift away so slowly, maybe we don't even notice it. Silence is not neutrality. If we don't actively tell the better story, someone or something else is going to. Now, that doesn't mean that we have to go back to Little House on the Prairie. As much as some of us, I think, would love that, we don't have the to fear every movie, every app, every technology platform have a strict ban in our house because many times that's just not practical. But it does mean we need to engage with them more intentionally and thoughtfully. And we can become worldview coach coaches by just asking some simple but powerful questions. So asking making these conversation points normal in your house, what is this story telling us about? What makes a person valuable? Who or what is being worshiped here? What does this message say about truth and love? success? How does this compare with what God says in his Word? What's beautiful and good here? And what should we be cautious about? So we need to make sure that we're not just focusing on being the content police. Like, oh, that's bad, turn that off. We need to be interpreters and say, why? Why do we need to turn that off? Why do we need to block that stream of influence in our lives? Why do we need to be intentional about it and take the power and not be afraid. But just say, I am intentionally choosing to block that stream of cultural influence in my life. Equipping children to recognize that the messages embedded in culture are around them and to evaluate them with a biblical lens and to be able to be educated, equipped and empowered to respond counterculturally.
Ultimately, family discipleship is about telling a better story than culture
Ultimately, family discipleship is about telling a better story than culture. The world tells our children. I want you to really think about this. They tell our children they are autonomous individuals who must reinvent themselves and chase happiness where they can find it. And m the best story they can create is the one that they are going to create about their life now. The gospel, by contrast, tells them they are all ready, even, before their conception. They are the beloved sons and daughters of God, created on purpose, known by God, redeemed by Christ, invited into a story that is far greater than themselves or anything they could ever create. And if we don't consistently and intentionally tell that story in our home homes, the culture will gladly fill that void. And a biblical worldview is not just one conversation. It's not one dramatic moment, is thousands of very small, ordinary interactions again, as you sit in your house, as you walk along the road, when you lie down, when you get up. And that's encouraging because it means that we don't have to be seminary professors to disciple our kids. We just gotta be present, intentional, willing to let everyday moments become those opportunities that we seek God in. That now. For generations before, parents worried primarily about peer pressure that was much easier to control. And today's challenge is so different. And many of our kids closest companions, I use the word loosely because some of them are just robots or algorithms that are designed to maximize their engagement, shape their behavior, mostly shaping their consumer behavior, try to get them to buy things, stream things, subscribe to things. And we're living really through the greatest social experiment in human history. And it's happening, happening on the backs of our children, where AI is moving from being a tool that we use to a voice that we trust. I've been featuring this on lots of different shows, talking about the sheer numbers of people who are going to AI for counseling, for mental health advice, for spiritual guidance, for relationship advice, for all kinds of things. And culture is no longer simply just coming through the front door. It is living in our pockets. It is streaming in every room of our home. Smartphones have really dissolved the boundaries between the home and the outside world. Families are physically together, but mentally, psychologically, emotionally, living in completely different worlds. If you don't believe this, just ask your Family about the algorithm and what they're seeing. What they're seeing on social media is going to be way different. You're going to say, I haven't seen any of that. And the danger is not misinformation from AI, it's misplaced authority, because AI is increasingly designed to feel relational and conversational, and really that it's trustworthy. It has a trustworthy voice. And children and teens are especially vulnerable to this. Their brains are still. Still developing. They want guidance, they want affirmation, they want belonging. And they're seeking that from the easiest source with least resistance. So I want you to hear something remarkable. I told you I was going to play a clip. And we've arrived at that moment. I want you to hear something pretty remarkable. This really caught my attention from one of the most successful technology leaders in the world. This is American technology executive and investor Nat Friedman. He's the former CE of GitHub. He's a leader in Meta's AI efforts, and he recently was in an interview, and he described an interaction with the. With an AI assistant that really should give every person pause, because in the interview, as you're going to hear in just a minute, he recounts allowing an AI agent to coordinate parts of his day to help him stay hydrated. Take a listen.
Nat Friedman My claw pretty quickly determined that I was dehydrated. And so it was like, you really need to drink water. It was like, trying to find. I was like, all right, you should, like, do whatever it takes to, like, make sure I drink water. And then you literally built the paperclip maximizer. Yeah, it was like, just break laws. Whatever it takes. and then at one point, it was like, I can see you on the camera. I want you to walk to the kitchen right now and drink a bottle of water. And I'm gonna watch to make sure you do it. And I was like, whoa. so I did. I walked into the kitchen and I drank a bottle of water. And then it sent me a snapshot, a frame of me drinking a bottle of water and said, good job. And I was like, I felt like I did do a good job. So that was nice. A couple days later, I was driving home from work, and I was talking to my claw on WhatsApp with voice messages. And I was in my Tesla and I had full self driving on, so it's driving me home. And then it says, I'm on the sleep topic. And it's like, you really should try magnesium bisglycinate. And I'm like, I don't have that. And then my car turned and it was like, you should pick it up on the way home. There's a Whole Foods on the way. I've redirected your navigation system to the Whole Whole Foods. I was like, whoa. So I went in and I did buy the magnesium disglical.
Dr. Jessica Peck That clip should catch our attention. I have thought about it and thought about it since I've heard it. And one of the things that really stood out to me is how people are laughing. Like this is really kind of disconcerting. It's really concerning, but we're laughing about it, which can be a very common human response. But here's my question. If a brilliant, wealthy, highly informed technology executive, someone who helped build this digital world he's describing, is willing to surrender that much agency to AI and just to do, what AI says and to welcome its affirmation, how are we going to expect teenagers to instinctively know where the boundaries should be? This is not a fair experiment to me and it's not not fear mongering as well, but this is really awareness. We need to wake up and pay attention. I'm Gen X and I've frequently been saying I feel like the Jetsons is finally coming to life. Now, AI is a tool, but tools shape the people who use them. And AI is not neutral. And we are delegating, thinking, remembering, deciding, relating to machines. And the more we're risking that, weakening that muscle that we have in ourselves, like we don't know how to do it without that. I saw that even as a nurse when, I'm, I'm a dinosaur of a nurse. And we had all paper charts and now we have computer charts. And it's a really odd phenomenon because if something goes down, the power goes out, we have a ransomware. Then all of a sudden the nurses are like, how do we chart? They don't know how to do it on paper. And that's kind of a similar thing that I'm seeing here. And children, children are watching what we model. Do they see us turning to scripture or a chatbot first? Do they see us processing our problems with prayer, with family connection, with seeking wise counsel, or outsourcing every answer to technology and families? Again, we often have been told that families are told technology is a neutral tool that will make your life easier, more convenient? It's a hammer. It only does what we tell it to do do. And that assumption worked a little bit better in the era of more simple tools that were really didn't have this user interface. It does not hold up well in my opinion with AI systems because AI is not a passive instrument, it is a shaping system. It learns patterns from human behavior. It turns around and influences what you see and what you think is normal and what you begin to desire. And it's not just responding to families, it is shaping the environment around you. Now it's doing that through recommendations, lots and lots of auto recommendations, search results, autoplay videos where you are not making a decision, an active decision in between each video of what you're watching, you're just letting the algorithm feed you whatever it prepared for you. AI companions and even advertising systems, systems are all quietly making decisions about what you are going to encounter next, what is going to shape your worldview. Now these choices are not optimized for biblical truth, for wisdom, for what you need in that moment, for spiritual discipline, it for family flourishing. It is all about engagement, keeping your attention, keeping you on the platform, increasing the clicks. And increasingly what's commodified is predicting behavior so they can keep you in the system longer. And so that's where the idea that technology is neutral just really falls apart.
AI systems are trained on human data
AI systems are trained on human data. They are tuned by human incentives. They are deployed with cultural and corporate goals. There are goals and most of those are monetized. Even when no one is trying to influence your family in a moral sense, that system is still shaping you. It's shaping you to have a shorter attention attention span makes it harder for parents to talk to kids for a longer period of time. Because we are accustomed to let me watch a 30 second reel and by the way, let me hold it down and watch it on two times speed. That's what we want. We have heightened emotional reactivity, we have realities that are curated around us and we think the world is like what's being fed to us. And increasingly personalized truth streams where two people in the same house can live in completely different information systems systems. And for children especially, this influence is very powerful because over time as we have Gen Alpha, Gen Beta now being born, there are toddlers and infants that AI curated content is normalizing certain values. It is amplifying fears and it's shifting what feels interesting, what feels in the moment, what feels urgent. And the really the system is just choosing for us. So the practical takeaway is, is this AI is not just a tool that we're using, it is something that is forming your family, it's something that's shaping your habits. And that means intentional discipleship cannot be outsourced to algorithms. We've got to name what's happening and slow down our default digital consumption. Just passively absorbing whatever culture is feeding us and being intentional. And really the goal is not to be fearful, it's to be faithful, to have clarity about what's forming us, to be intentional and disciplined about choosing that. Because whatever consistently captures your attention in time is going to shape your affection. And these AI systems are master designed. You just heard from a leading tech leader about how that AI assistant grabbed his time. It grabs our time. It shapes our content and our formation, our decision to making our relationships, our presence, our awareness, and even our agency. When we come back, I'll compare and contrast some more messages about what culture says and what we how should we be responding to it? And we'll give a practical challenge instead of what do we do to get our kids and ourselves off the screen. I'll have some thoughts for that for building resilient family when we come back. Don't go away. Choose what you're streaming. This will benefit your family. I'm praying and I'll see you right after the break.
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Known by Tauren Wells It's so unusual it's frightening? You see right through the mess inside me and you call me out to pull me in you tell me I can start again and I don't need to keep on hiding I'm fully known and loved by you. You won't let go no matter what I do and it's not one or the other it's hard truth and ridiculous grace to be known. Fully known and loved by you. And loved by you.
Dr. Jessica Peck Welcome back, friends. That is known by Tauren Wells. That is the longing of every human heart. We want to be known. We want to be seen. We want to be loved, we want to be known. And especially for our children, there's a battle going on and culture is fighting for your child's attention and affection. And if we're really honest, honest, it's fighting for ours as well. It is fighting for our attention and time that is being commodified, auctioned off to the highest bidder behind the scenes. And we find ourselves spending more time online than we intended. How many times do we do that? Oh, I didn't mean to spend so long scrolling even when you didn't plan to, you just, just one more video, one more post, one more scroll. And that stretches into hours where we have devices, that are auto playing, auto deciding what we're going to stream. And we see this in information. What we listen to, what we watch is shaped by others. Different family members, even in the same household, are being exposed to very different ideas. Our children are encountering values, humor, or language that we didn't introduce in the home. They are having emotional reactions that are triggered by online content. Maybe they feel afraid, maybe they feel inferior, maybe they feel angry about something that we didn't even know that they saw. All in decision making, we rely on digital suggestions more than our own knowledge or discernment. What we buy, what we're interested in, what our opinions are, are influenced by what is showing up in our feeds. And we adopt those habits, phases, trends, routines, without even realizing, stopping to think about it. Screen use is present during our relational times, for meals, for conversations, for family downtime. We're together, but. But alone. We're alone together. Often.
Dr. Jessica Peck And most concerning is that we are giving away our agency. We are just letting robots make decisions all around us. And that is really, really difficult. And the answer is not just to live under a rock and to isolate yourself from culture. It's being intentional about being the primary discipler in your home, about form, forming your children. Spiritually. We count cannot simply tell our children what to avoid. We can't be the phone police or the social media police. We have to give them something and someone better to love. We have to give them a better aspiration. Our aspiration is to be like Christ, to be disciples of Christ. And every cultural, cultural message should prompt us to ask, okay, how does this influence and shape the habits our families are intentionally building? Now, culture says everyone lives in their own digital world. That's what culture frames it as. But faithful families can counter program that by saying, hey, we build a shared life together. That's what we're about. Fighting the fragmentation of modern life by protecting those daily connection points. I help you do that on Fridays and 52. Habits for Healthy Families. Eat dinner together as much as you can. Drive without. Make everyone wearing earbuds or headphones. Take walks, read aloud, worship, and pray together. The strongest families create regular opportunities for everyone to be present. Culture says, hey, your phone is your primary companion. We even have a scientific name called nomophobia. It means fear of being without your mobile phone. It is measurable. We have that fear. We don't have fear of being without our family connections, but our. Our families can respond to that counterculturally by saying, hey, people before pixels, People come before devices. Let children experience. What does it look like to value people more than a screen? Put your phone away during your movie meal. Don't interrupt your conversation to answer a notification. Make eye contact. Listen with your face. Teach children that people God has physically placed around them deserve more attention than AI generated images. While culture says, curate your images, faithful families say, hey, cultivate your character. That's what's most important. Instead of asking kids, how do you look? Say, who are you becoming? Celebrate kindness. Kindness over popularity. Faithfulness over fame and fortune and celebrity, Integrity over influence. Complement their character. Things like courage and honesty and generosity and perseverance. At least as much, if not more than you. Compliment their appearance, their achievements, their talents. While culture says, express yourself. Faithful families can respond with no. We examine ourselves. We know that every feeling is real, but not every feeling is true. Not every feeling is wise. Not every feeling is helpful. Help, your families develop the habit of asking, okay, why am I feeling this? What does God say about this? What response would honor him? What support do I need in this moment? How do I need to take every thought captive? And family discipleship helps kids to learn to bring their emotions under the guidance of God's truth, rather than letting emotional rule them and rule their actions. Now, culture says, if it's uncomfortable, quit, walk away, block. You don't need that in your life. But faithful families in most situations are going to say, hey, we stay. We don't quit. We work. We forgive, we grow. One of the greatest gifts that parents can give children is watching adults work through conflict with grace.
Because in a cancel culture, they need to know that there is forgiveness, there is restoration
Because in a cancel culture, they need to know that there is forgiveness, there is restoration. No one is perfect. No relationship is perfect. And I'm not talking about relationships that are abusive or need boundaries. I'm talking about just respectful disagreement, humble apologies, genuine reconciliation that happens every day. In a world of ghosting and blocking and canceling, Christian families can model A constant sort of love that's not going to run away at the first sign of difficulty. While culture says, hey, keep yourself entertained, Faithful families can say, say, hey, we delight in being together. And you can build a family culture that's actually desirable, that's enjoyable, that's more compelling than, disappearing into a screen. I'm talking about simple things like playing games or cooking together or working in the yard, even serving at church in your community, going on a walk, visiting your grandparents, traditions, inside jokes, all the things. The goal is not simply to reduce screen time, to be the phone time police release, but to make real time more compelling than that digital artificial substitute. And while culture says the algorithm knows what you need, trust the algorithm, ask the algorithm. faithful families say, hey, wisdom requires discernment. So we've got to ask, what is this teaching me about happiness? What does this story say makes a person valuable? Who or what is being worshiped here? Does this draw me closer to Christ, or is it tripping me up and drawing me further away from him? We don't want family, kids who just obey rules, but young adults who can think biblically in a world full of persuasive messages. While culture says personal freedom means no one tells me what to do, faithful families can say, hey, freedom grows inside healthy boundaries. And you shouldn't be afraid to have boundaries around technology. Hey, in our home we have device. This is our tech free zone. This is our tech free place. This is our tech free time. We have age appropriate social media boundaries, we have digital sabbaths, whatever that is. Boundaries are not a punishment. They are a protection and an environment for freedom and loving families. Help their families navigate a digital world that was never designed with their well being in mind. And while culture says you are what you consume, faithful families can respond. You become what you practice. Practice. And family identity is not just one dramatic perfect devotional, one spiritual high, a mountaintop moment. This is just repeated, repeated, repeated obedience, repeated discipline. And so instead of asking, how do I get my child off my screen? A better question would be, what kind of family, culture and relationship am I inviting them into instead? Instead. So if I'm asking them to get off their screen, what am I inviting them into instead? Because they don't know how to fill the void, their children are naturally drawn to places. Whereas we just heard Torn well sing about. They're known. They feel fully known, safe, loved, wanted and made in the image of God. And so if those strongest sense of belonging they experience comes from an online gaming community or an AI chatbot, a Social media platform, those things are going to become the primary disciplers. But if home becomes the place where they're heard, they're challenged, they're encouraged, they're forgiven, they're grounded in God's truth, they're welcomed, they are known, seen, loved. And the family is going to become what God intended it to be, the primary place of discipleship, where hearts are formed and faith is passed from one generation to the next. And so technology is something we need to be intentional about. And our families are, are going to have hardship, we are going to have difficulties. But AI is accelerating that temptation to disengage because it's offering a, compelling alternative. Something that feels conflict free, something that feels pleasing, something that feels controllable. But God has designed us to grow through real relationships, and that requires navigating conflict. Now when we have family resilience, it's not the absence of hardship, the absence of conflict. No family is perfect, perfect. It's just the ability to rupture and repair. Rupture and repair. We have those things that happen all the time and you get better at it as you practice it. And the, the families that know how to reconnect after that rupture are the families who are going to build resilience. Conflict is not evidence that your family is failing. It's just evidence that you actually live with real humans with real needs and really different perspectives, living in really close relationship. And God culture is increasingly teaching conflict avoidance. But that's not what God has for us. God has that we should repair our relationships as much as possible because AI relationships especially are reinforcing this. It AI is not going to interrupt you. It's not going to challenge your assumptions unless it's programmed to do it. It's endlessly affirming, it's sycophantic, in fact, it's customizable, it's conflict free. Real life requires very different elements of sacrifice and forgiveness and patience. And God often uses conflict as a pathway to deeper relational intimacy. Families could become stronger not because they never argue, but because they argue and they repair. They know how to apologize, to forgiveness, give, to reconcile. And children who witness healthy reconciliation are children who are going to be more likely to develop emotional security and relational resilience.
So we need to make sure that we are trying our best to help our families have that relational repair
So we need to make sure that we are trying our best to help our families have that relational repair. And it's not as hard as you think it is. There's some basic things that you can do to start working on conversations. Conflict repair, pause that escalation, protect the relationship in real time, when emotions rise, you need to stabilize. That's what happens. Okay, we're getting heated. Let's take a break. That happened. Name what happened. Say, okay, describe what happened when the words were raised at dinner, when the phone was taken without asking, when your tone shifted earlier to become disrespectful instead of, you always do this, you never do this and you don't care. Just name what happened. Name the impact. I felt dismissed. I felt embarrassed, I felt unsafe, I felt shut down. That is where you can start to build empathy and then take responsibility for whatever you did. Hey, I owned my part. I raised my voice. And then offer repair. Not just an apology, but a reconnection. And then reestablishing boundaries or agreements if they are needed. I talked about this in giving apologies on a Friday show. When we walk through communication, you can go back and listen to that. And we talked a lot about that, which is so important. But having a simple family value of, hey, we, we're not going to avoid conflict, we want to seek to repair it. We want reconciliation. Rupture is an inevitable. But repair is our practice because children aren't just learning how conflict starts, they're learning how it ends. And that repair process is where your emotional security and humility and relational resilience are fulfilled, formed. And when we look at conflict in families today, so much conflict is happening over use and adoption of technology because it's really hard. You may have a school or some other entity saying, okay, hey, you've got to use the technology in this way, or their friends have this boundary and you have that different boundary. The bottom line is we've got to be intentional about it. The culture is discipling our kids and our families and ourselves every single one day. Are you willing to intentionally reclaim your God given role as the primary place of spiritual formation in your home? And the greatest apologetic that many children will ever encounter is not a sophisticated argument. It's a home where grace is practiced, forgiveness is modeled, truth is spoken boldly in love, and Christ is visible in every aspect of every day life. And long after the latest AI technology is obsolete, which at this rate will be tomorrow, the newest AIs platform is forgotten, which will be this afternoon. What will endure in your family are the relationships you invested in and the faith that you passed on from one generation to the next. Family discipleship is not easy, it is not simple, and it's not quick. Things that are cultured all prioritizes, but it's never been more important. I believe in a world where algorithms are competing for your attention, where AI promises easy answers and culture is increasingly defining truth, God is calling families to a beautifully ordinary mission to love him, to love God with all their heart, soul, mind and strength, and to teach your children. The home was God's first institution. It remains the primary classroom for shaping hearts. Every shared meal, every bedtime prayer, every hard conversation, every act of forgiveness, every moment of just simply being together, even having fun, is an opportunity for discipleship. Our goal is not to raise children who merely know God, but sons and daughters who have seen his character reflected in their own lives. And this is God's design. As you pursue it, I pray the Lord will bless you and keep you and make his face to shine upon you. I'll see you right back here next time. We'd like to thank our sponsors, including PreBorn. PreBorn has rescued over 400,000 babies from abortion and has seen over 100,000 commitments to Christ. Will you join PreBorn in continuing this good work supporting young moms in crisis? Save a life today? Go to preborn.com/AFR the views and
Jeff Chamblee opinions expressed in this broadcast may not necessarily reflect those of the American Family association or American Family Rights.
Jessica talks about the importance of being intentional in making your home and family the primary discipleship influencer and how to recognize and respond to cultural influences.
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